4th of July Specials!

Show those big fat rich white golf buddies of yours the true power of pride as you bat that little tiny ball around acres and acres beautiful land wasted on the elitist and boring sport known as golf.  This Uncle Sam headcover will leave them in awe, barely able to wipe the drool off their puffy, pale jowls.

Awwww, now this is cute:  a red-white-blue teddy bear with the good o'l USA stitched on it.  And look!  The USA has a halo!  That means we're, like, holy and stuff, right?  Kewl!  God is on our side, after all.  Those other countries don't stand a chance, 'cause Jesus is our personal good buddy.  Yeeee-hawww!

No child's bedroom is complete without a patriotic theme.  Everyone knows that not having a patriotic theme can lead to disastrous results:  terrorism, cannibalism, and (worst of all) non-Republican voting.  So get your little brat a bedroom setup like this, before it's too late!

Say, how many times have you yearned to leave your mark on those juicy, sizzlin' steaks you're grillin' up at today's 4th of July BBQ?  Well, now's your chance!  Make sure everyone knows your meat is 100% good ol' God-blessed number-one American with these handy branders!  Burn it with logos for USA, the Navy, or the Marines.  Works great on the kids, too!

Comments

[Bwah]

They should come out with a 'Mad Cow' brander!